


To The Heaven In Your Eyes

by orphan_account



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Angst, I wrote it, Liam alone, Louis doesn't actually appear here, M/M, Past Relationship(s), Pining Liam, Songfic, Trigger?Maybe?, Which is ridiculous cause it's not even a song, Why am I tagging this shit, only in Liam's mind, so much greyness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-29
Updated: 2013-03-29
Packaged: 2017-12-06 20:44:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 661
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/739974
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Liam is alone, so alone.</p>
            </blockquote>





	To The Heaven In Your Eyes

**Author's Note:**

> I actually wrote this lyrics myself, so I don't know if I should call it a song-fic...But it is! A song-fic, I mean.
> 
> First attempt at fanfics, cut me some slack please...and some feedback would not hurt you when you dish it out (Unless your keyboards suddenly decides to burn up, or something.)

_I feel like being light years away_

_If I reach up way high_

_Could I catch one of them stars?_

_To give away_

 

Liam’s grey bedroom ceiling felt too bare, and his room felt too bare without Louis’ personality to fill it up. He treasured the moments, the hidden little moments with Louis, every whisper and little passing caresses, to keep him company when no one was next to him in his bed. Liam opens up the drawer in his mind simply labelled ‘Louis’ and it all fills up his ceiling like million little stars, all spelling out his name.

 

_To you so think of a single wish_

_And my name in one thought_

_I'll make a thousand shooting stars_

_Raining down_

 

“Louis” Liam whispered, as if the slightest disturbance would make all the images vanish. It probably would. Imaginations were a fragile thing.

“Louis. I want you here. Louis.” Liam let out a sob, clutching onto the pillow on his bed-- _Louis’ pillow_ \--and hid his face into it.

Louis. Louis was everywhere. His scent weaving themselves into the pillows and sheets. His messy handwriting on the post-its, tacked onto the fridge, the occasional grocery lists and the frequent ‘I love you’s. The sofa where Louis will let Liam watch Toy Story, and begrudgingly say out the lines of the movie when Liam begged him to do so, with his puppy eyes. Louis, currently smiling down at Liam, his face on the ceiling, in Liam’s mind.

 

_And you said you need space_

_And that's okay_

_I'll be a million miles away_

_If it means you'll come for me_

_But now my head up in stars_

_To the heaven in your eyes_

 

Louis’ eyes. The sparkling blue was now a huge wave of ocean, swallowing up Liam, dragging him down deep under.

 

_I feel like a million miles away_

_If I reach a bit far_

_Could I reach the end of world?_

_I'd get away_

 

He’d really get away. Away from this Louis-filled flat, which was ridiculous because it was his flat. Away from the sympathising look of his bandmates, from the controlling managment, away from the happy smiles of Louis on the internet, directed to someone else.

 

_But could you find me here?_

_And would you try?_

_Till all the roads are running dry_

_and heavy under your feet_

 

He had said he’d be back. That he loved Liam, and Liam only. Liam had believed then, in Louis arms, under his blue-eyed gaze. Now, alone in his grey room in his cold bed, with a blade and white pills in hand, he’s not so sure.

 

_And you said you need space_

_And that's okay_

_I'll be a million miles away_

_If it means you'll come for me_

_But now my head up in stars_

_To the heaven in your eyes_

 

Louis’ eyes. Liam had once lied down right next to him, and had counted every little specks of gold in it, twinkling every time Liam had told him to keep his eyes open. ( "I'm not getting paid enough for this. Should've requested 10 kisses a minute instead of five." Louis would say, and Liam would fondly roll his eyes and give him a peck on the lips. )  

Louis’ eyes. Now it was the vastness of the clear blue sky, filled with golden stars raining down, pounding down on Liam.

 

_I'll be a million miles away_

_Floating light-years away,_

_To the heaven in your eyes._

 

Liam could feel the world disappearing, taking Louis with it. His bedroom began to blur. Liam was spinning. No, actually it was the world spinning while Liam was perfectly still, and he couldn’t picture Louis on the ceiling, no more. A tear trickled down, then a sigh of relief.

It was all disappearing now, the pain, heartbreak, breakdowns alone on the cold granite kitchen floor, crumpled up love letters, the half-written love songs for Louis, Louis’ sad, dull blue eyes as he said goodbye, and….

 

 

 

Liam.

 

**Author's Note:**

> So, I don't know if you actually understood it, but Liam just died. Committed suicide. Which is why it's tagged 'trigger?Maybe'. 
> 
> Urggg I'm so bad at this.


End file.
